"Do These Pamps Make My Butt Look Fat?"

"Grandpa
do you think
these shorts
make my
butt look
fat?"
"Well my
crunchy little
chicharon, do
you want me
to tell you the
truth or do
you want me
to lie? Cuz if
I tell you a lie, then you'll be wondering in the future if
everything I say is true...but if I tell you the truth, and
by the way, if you ask a question like the one you asked,
you already know the answer...so if I tell you the truth,
then you'll prolly hate me and you're gonna feel hurt and
you'll be wondering if Sir Mix-a-lot wrote that song for you,
and way after you've toned it down after long hours at the
gym, you'll occasionally think about what I said about your
okole/lobot/puwet and think, "My Grandpa is an idiot."
One time, somebody told me to check out a guy's mole...
and I never noticed it before, but after he pointed it out
I kept looking at it like it might explode."
"Grandpa, is my butt gonna explode?"