Listening to the Whisper

  

"Grandpa, I love my sister Naialii so much."

"Yeah, well why do you love her? Can she play games?"

"Um, no...she don't play games yet."

"Okay...um...does she know how to talk to you and stuff?"

"No, she just makes sounds but she don't really talk."

"Okay...um...does she know how to walk and do stuff?"

"No, she can't walk yet...she just kinda lays there."

"Well, she doesn't sound like much fun."

"Actually Grandpa, she's a lot of fun....she's always smiling

and she's always laughing and she's always following me 

around with her eyes...if I go somewhere, she contorts her

body to watch what I'm doing and is always laughing at 

stuff that I do. I'm pretty sure she knows that I'm her sister

and I think she can tell that I love her. And she can't really talk, 

but if you listen really close, you can hear her whisper...

she's saying 'Mmmmmmm  Mmmmmm' but I can tell that

she's really saying in her own way, 'Sister, I love you'."

"Yeah? Let me listen............Nah, she's just making noise"

I Love My Grandpa

Naialii Talking to "The Scar"

"Grandpa, where'd you get that scar?"
"A shark bit me when I was out with Jerry, Bertleman, and Buttons."
"Did it hurt when the shark bit you?"
"Why don't you ask the scar yourself? He's cool with it."
"Hi Scar. Did it hurt when the shark bit you?"
"Girl...are you talking to a scar? Do you know how retarded that is?"
"Yeah, but I just wanna know how it was when the shark bit you."
"Yeah your Grandpa don't talk to me. He's still mad about the bite.
Listen, it was cold, it was wet, and the ocean was angry that day. The
shark bit me, he did his thing, and now I'm here with my scar lipstick. The ocean belongs to the fish... and it's their world. Your world is just
pretending to be talking to your retarded Grandpa and pretending to
be talking to a scar wearing lipstick."
"Sorry Scar. Sorry bout the shark, and sorry bout the lipstick."
"It's all good. Just tell your Grandpa that Scar says 'Hi' ."

Grandpa's Rule

"Grandpa, do you wish I was a boy?"
"Nah cuz you're my daughter's kid. Your mom could
have all girls and it's all good. But your uncles should
have boys cuz "sons should have boys" is the rule."
"Grandpa, what kind of retarded rule is that?"
"I don't know, I guess it's just my rule. Anyway, your 
mom is good at making girls so she could just stick with
that and make some more girls one of these days."
"Grandpa, don't you think that if she's good at making
girls that she'd be just as good at making boys?"
"I guess we'll just find out one of these days."
"Ha ha ha ha, Grandpa, you're retarded." 

What's REALLY Retarded?

"Grandpa, my Aunty Mahina is carrying me cuz I can't walk or 

nothing ....so that's pretty retarded, yeah?"

"Well actually, that's not really so retarded... not as much as
imaginary conversations with a 4 month old baby."
"Yeah, that's super retarded. Grandpa, what else is retarded?"
"How about Al Davis?"
"Ha ha ha! Yeah, that guy is NUTS!"
"And what about Vietnamese restaurants that think I'm gonna
wrap my lumpia in a leaf of lettuce?"
"What? That's really REALLY retarded."
"And what about cameras at intersections?"
"Hoh BRAH!! That's ESPECIALLY retarded."
"And what about Grandma THELMA???"
"Grandma Thelma?? HA HA HA HA!! STOP IT! 
YOU'RE KILLING ME!!!"